Archive for the ‘tarot business’ Category

Questionable Questions

Friday, July 23rd, 2010

During my typical day as a tarot reader, I get a wide variety of questions tossed at me by my clients.  It runs the gamut from typical romantic issues to more complex situations such as connecting with a departed loved one.  I never know what to expect and have always allowed my clients to feel as if they can bring any question to the table.

In some cases a client may ask something that pushes outside my comfort zone. This is not odd as you think as most tarot readers have guidelines about what is an acceptable question to ask and boundaries vary greatly from reader to reader. (For example, some tarot readers do not answer any questions about health while others have no issue with this.)  Each reader finds their own “code of ethics” that suits their needs and the needs of their clients.

I often find myself contemplating about what makes a question “acceptable” or “unethical”.  Are there some questions a reader should refuse to answer?  And if you are not comfortable with a question, is there a way to still help the client find direction? Can we safely have a universal “code of ethics” or should that be left up to the reader?

  1. Most tarot readers are NOT lawyers, doctors, stock brokers or licensed therapists.  We should never take the place of these professionals. That being said, we can answer general questions about these fields but it is still in the best interests of the reader and the client to refer them to a professional.  Doing otherwise puts the reader and the client in a possibly risky and legally compromising position.  I am careful about how I answer these types of questions and I always keep a list of professionals for referrals. An example: rather than give legal advice, I might look and see if the outcome of a case is favorable to a client.  That is still helpful for them but I am not assuming the role of a lawyer.
  2. Some tarot readers will not answer a question about a third party as they see this as “spying”.  I feel differently about this as giving a client insight into another person may pave the way for communication, compassion and understanding.  I encourage follow up questions such as “how can I help” which can empower the client to make better decisions regarding their relationships.  If you are not comfortable answering questions about others, let the client know and see if you can rephrase the question in a manner that still gives the client helpful information.
  3. Criminal activity is a dicey topic and giving advice here could put you in hot water should you be called to testify against a client.  In some situations, you might even be seen as party to a crime (ex: giving information on “how” to get away with an offense).    Yes, do not be surprised – criminals DO come to tarot readers seeking advice!  Typical questions may include  “am I being watched” and “who can I trust”.  But some may ask heavier questions and you may find yourself nervously turning over those cards, wondering if you are putting someone’s life at risk. This is where I have learned to draw the line.  In my opinion, if a person is seeking my services only to become a better criminal rather than a better person, then I need to disconnect.
  4. If you are uncomfortable with any question, it is best to be honest with your client.  See if you can rephrase questions in a way that still helps them get information while maintaining your boundaries.  And do not ever shame your client by saying something such as “that is against my code of ethics”. This makes the client feel judged for wanting the information they feel they need.
  5. A universal code of ethics may be difficult to apply simply because each reader is different and each client is unique. Some tarot organizations have a set of standards that their members agree to abide by.  This is not a bad idea but you may want to  contemplate if these guidelines work for you as a reader and ask if there is room for flexibility.  Do not agree to anyone else’s rules of conduct unless you are absolutely sure that you can stick with it.

Ultimately, this is all a matter of personal preference.  For myself, respect and compassion for my clients is always my number one priority.  I try to serve their needs in any way that I can as I know that sometimes this is the last place they turn to when they  need insight into their problems.  It is not my job to judge what they ask but to find a way to answer their questions with dignity and compassion.

I’d love to hear your thoughts on using the tarot to answer questions.  What do you feel is the best way to handle questionable questions?  Is there a way that you think clients should ask questions?

Blessings!

Theresa

image by Taoxproductions

The Tarot Police Live Inside Of Your Head

Sunday, July 4th, 2010

Recently, the noise around the controversial topic of “tarot certification” has gotten a bit louder and rather heated.  I’ve written posts with my thoughts, and various Blog Talk Radio shows have addressed the subject as well. It was refreshing to hear and assess the many varied viewpoints and perspectives on the subject, and as positive open dialogue often does, the process has revealed a few new thoughts that have piqued my interest and raised new concerns.

Some of the people who were pro-certification were unable to articulate how certification would serve the tarot community.  And then there were those who viewed certification as being “for the consumer” and a way to make the tarot reader “accountable”. Let’s pause and think about that for a minute. In my opinion, these statements present some serious questions that need to be answered.

First of all, words mean things. Words that are meant to sound nice and compelling on a brochure or one page web pitch for an organization are often glanced over without much critical attention paid to the actual practical implications, processes and actions they entail. From time to time, we all tend to get lost between glossy imagery, ad copy and our own fantasies of what a benign and wonderful organization might be like, but what is important is what those words actually mean for those who decide to actually sign on.

For instance, what exactly does “accountability” mean for tarot readers?  When someone says that their organization will hold a reader “accountable” how exactly do they intend to do that? And for what?  And with what financial backup?  What authority do they have? Tarot Police? Why would a client need an organization to handle complaints when we already have a legal system in place and specific laws to handle consumer related issues?  And more importantly, what is the certifying body’s business structure and how will that influence their criteria for “recourse”?

1. A certifying body needs to be clear about their business structure because there are different legal rules for each type of organization.  A non-profit, for example, has very strict legal requirements whereas a private club can create any body of laws they want to as long as they are not illegal.  The most likely model for a legitimate certifying body would be a non-profit because they don’t have any other business interests and would also have a board of directors, federal guidelines, mandatory meetings, as well as a democratic voting system which would insure that the community gets a voice in choosing leaders.  This would also lessen the possibility of a few self appointed tarot dictators being able to maintain absolute power.

2. Some of these certifying bodies claim to be for the consumer. The idea here is that a potential client could feel “safe” going to a “certified” reader.  (In all the years I have been reading, I have NEVER had a client ask to see my certification.  Most people who seek a tarot reader find us through word of mouth, not through searching some internet data base list of “certified” readers.) These organizations also say that they will offer a “recourse” if the client is unsatisfied or if the tarot reader doesn’t abide by the board’s “code of ethics”. These organizations should be able to clearly spell out the process for filing a complaint and have rules in place to insure that this doesn’t become a convenient forum for any crackpot to file grievances just to get freebies – or worse yet settle scores with rivals or slander other members with malicious intent.

3. Recourse needs to be defined clearly.  What kind of “recourse” can a certified tarot reader expect should a client file a complaint? Will they lose their certification?  Or will the reader be forced to issue a refund?  Or will nothing at all be done?  This is troubling to me because I do not want anyone telling me how to run my business.  I would never hand over that authority to anyone but myself.  Do I really want to put my business in a position where there is even a tiny threat of outside interference in my own policies?  If there is no clear idea of what this “recourse” could entail, then I encourage you to think long and hard before you put your name on the dotted line.  Know what you are getting into and what your rights are should a problem ever arise.

4. If a tarot reader loses their certification, would this be done publicly?  And if so, is there a policy in place to insure that the reader is not slandered by the certifying board?  How can we be sure that privacy and dignity would be preserved even for people who get uncertified?

5. Who polices the police? How can one be sure that the members of the certifying body practice what they preach?  In other words, if someone is going to try and monitor my business, what checks and balances are in place to make sure the powers that be also adhere to these standards?  And if they don’t – what is the recourse for THEM?  Would the tarot community be able to oust an unethical board member?

Although some of these certifying boards are quick to say that they don’t want to “police” the tarot community, aren’t they doing just that by creating arbitrary codes of ethics and then trying to enforce them amongst those who join up?  Is that piece of paper really worth going after if it gives someone else a license to tell you how to run your business?  Could there be legal implications and interference if the organization (either unwittingly or intentionally) steps into a situation that has real legal consequences?

I have seen all this and many more ugly things transpire first hand, over and over again in other supposedly “spiritual” oriented communities. Be it Tarot, Yoga, or just about any other community organization or “governing body” of any sort, the principle is simple, ancient and universal…power corrupts, and absolute power corrupts absolutely.  We all need to put on our thinking caps and pull out our best research skills and psychic guns when anyone is declaring to place some form of authority over another.

In a world that has become increasingly geared toward high speed internet instant gratification, we all need to hold back that urge to click and remember that words are not just set dressing for a sales pitch. Look at the fine print and read between the lines.

Blessings!

Theresa

image courtesy of taoxproductions (special thank you to taox for all the help! xxoo)

The Care And Feeding Of Tarot Readers

Friday, June 18th, 2010

If you’re thinking about becoming a professional tarot reader, I’d like to let you in on a little secret: tarot reading is hard, taxing work. You may wonder how this could be, as it appears like the reader is just sitting around tossing a few cards on a table and chatting with people.  Well, on the outside it may look like “having a good time” hanging with clients, but truth is, this career demands a lot from those who intend to walk the walk.  Many fellow readers tell me how drained  and burnt out they can feel at times.  Over the course of twenty years as a professional tarot reader, I too have experienced this myself and have had to develop tools to help me remain grounded and balanced.

Self awareness is the first key.  Over the years,  I’ve learned to become more sensitive to the warning signs when my energy is unbalanced:

  • Feeling depleted/ lethargic/ drained
  • Depression
  • Addictive behavior (for me excessive eating of sweets)
  • Putting on excessive weight
  • Less psychic sensitivity
  • Irritability/ impatience

When you are doing any sort of spiritual work, you collect negative energy from the people that seek your services.  Understand this: it’s not deliberate on the part of the client.  A tarot reader has to be open to the experience – and often times the querent may be coming with a lot of emotional baggage or heavy issues, which can be absorbed by the reader.  Once the reading is over and the client leaves, this energy remains with you.  And over time, this can build up, layer by layer and begin to affect the quality of your readings – or in extreme circumstances, your health.  You may not notice it right away but eventually if this negativity is not released, it will weigh you down and undermine your ability to remain a clear channel for your clients.

For me, this happens less these days as I make my self-care and spiritual health a priority.  I have found that it is vital to keep your psychic tools sharp, clean and maintained if you want to continue on this path without jeopardizing your sanity or health.  It all starts with boundaries.  I maintain the strictest of boundaries and put limits on a client’s access to me.  My guidelines, for example,  are:

  • All appointments must be scheduled in advance.  No last minute appointments
  • I do not answer “quick questions” over the phone
  • A 3 – 6 month wait between appointments (sometimes longer for some clients)
  • If a client sounds extremely distressed, I may make them wait until they are more calm and focused
  • No-shows get banned

You’ll have to choose what boundaries are comfortable for you.  Some readers are a bit more lax and it doesn’t seem to affect them at all.  For myself, I have found that I function better with structure and this allows my readings to remain objective.

In addition to establishing some ground rules with your clients, it is also important that you create time and space for self care.  Not only eating well and exercising, but also tending to your spiritual life.  There are a few things I do to keep my chakras balanced, energy stable and psychic channels clear:

  • Meditation - spending time with your inner self connects you to the guidance within and allows you to quiet the mind.  Meditation helps to work out your own issues and allows you to become friends with your SELF.  This leads to greater compassion, and that benefits YOU and your clients.
  • Exercise – negative energy can get stored in the body.  Taking time every day to do some sort of physical exercise (I prefer yoga) will insure you are not holding on to difficult emotions or bad energy, which could lead to illness or a feeling of being drained.
  • Pace yourself – I keep a schedule and only read tarot 4 days a week and I limit the number of  clients I see.  Avoid over doing it as that is the surest way to burn out.
  • Bodywork – Massage is a wonderful way to release trapped energy and restore the mind, body and spirit.
  • Eat well – it’s no secret that I love to eat.  Good nutrition paves the way for a healthy body and mind.  However, when I am absorbing too much energy from my clients, I’ll go on mad candy binges!  I try to limit my sweets but more importantly – if I am choosing to eat poorly, I look at my work and see what needs tweaking.  Perhaps a day off or an extra yoga practice could fend off the poor eating habits.
  • Salt baths – at times, my boundaries may be crossed by some really negative client and I find myself completely drained.  A salt bath will cleanse the aura and restore my sixth sense.  It’s very simple to do – fill a tub with warm water and about a cup (or more) of sea salt. Soak for a good 20 minutes.  Air dry.  This works wonders and I swear by it!
  • Candles – I’m a huge fan of candles for cleansing my tarot room and  charging myself and my cards.  I use the Tarot Tools candles by Coventry Creations, which were made especially for tarot readers!  The Energy Boost and Psychic Cleansing candles are a MUST in any tarot reader’s arsenal!

The wise tarot readers will make sure that they keep themselves in tip top shape, from head to toe to soul.  It makes all the difference  not just in the quality of the readings but in the quality of the reader’s LIFE.

Blessings!

Theresa

image courtesy of taoxproductions

How do you keep yourself sane and balanced? I’d love to hear your suggestions!  Post them in the comments section below!

You Don’t Own Me – Part 2: When To Let Go Of A Client

Monday, November 9th, 2009

Although I consider myself first and foremost a tarot reader, I am also a professional and I tend to be very business like in my dealings.  Most people who have worked with me know that I run my ship tightly – not only do I have regular hours like any job but my days can consist of all manner of tedious tasks from bookkeeping to returning calls and emails.  (It’s not all glamorous tarot work that I do here in my hub!)

As a business professional, I have to be realistic that not every person that calls or walks in the door is meant to be a lifetime client.  As I wrote in my previous post, some people may never come back for whatever reason.  But there are also times when I have had to show someone the door.  As much as I hate doing this (believe it or not, my bark is worse than my bite!), it is often not only beneficial for me but sometimes in the best interest of the client.

When is it right to “fire” a client?

Any tarot reader will have their own reasons why. For me, it all comes down to two things – respect and compatibility.  Here are some of the reasons I have needed to cut a client off:

1.  No shows. This is my number one pet peeve.  A client who doesn’t even have the courtesy to give me a simple phone call to cancel never gets another chance.  There are some who think I am sitting here with nothing else to do.  Believe me, I can either fill that spot if you didn’t show – or there are many other projects I can busy myself with (like writing this blog!).  To me, this is the rudest gesture as I make this time available and find it incredibly disrespectful.

2.  Dickering over prices. I hate haggling.  I don’t even do it when I travel.  I know in some cultures, this is a common thing, but for me, it feels uncomfortable.  If you can’t afford me, then don’t come.  Simple as that.  A woman who had booked a few parties with me in the past tried to tell me that “no one will pay that” when my prices changed – and then she tried to negotiate a price break.  I refused to do business with her ever again.  If you provide a service, you should be paid well for your time.  I learned this from my son’s drum instructor.  Years ago, he had also changed policies and this required a steep price hike. When I  visibly gulped, he said to me: “The lessons are free.  It is my time you are paying for and I value my time very much.”  I used that as a business mantra ever since.

3.  Using the tarot reading in an unethical way. I am not a moralist but I do not want my readings used in any way but for someone’s higher good.  Once they leave the office, I have no control over what a client may do with the information I provide.  On rare occasion, I do hear through the grapevine that someone may have twisted my words to suit a purpose.  For example, a married man got a reading from me and wanted to know if he could “have an affair”.  The reading said he “could” if he was so inclined.  So what does he do?  Proceeds a few weeks later to hit on a woman and tell her that  “Theresa the tarot reader said I should have an affair so I’m looking for a woman”.  Unfortunately for him, she was a friend of mine and reported back to me.  Banned for life.

4.  Personality conflicts.  Sometimes for no fault of the client or mine, our personalities don’t mesh.  If I am uncomfortable with a person’s vibe, I won’t read for them.  The reading won’t work well if I am tense.  This is never easy but I must face the facts that I cannot possibly read for every person.  For example, aggressive or super neurotic types don’t wash for me (I also don’t read well for “Debbie Downers”).  I will generally refer them to a more suitable tarot reader.  In my opinion,  is better to bring them to a person who will be more sympathetic to their energy rather than struggle through the reading myself.

5.  They are beyond your ability to help. This is a case where someone may need more help that you can give them – for example someone who needs psychiatric care.  I used to see a woman who was in an abusive relationship.  She would only come to me when they broke up – and her questions revolved around whether or not her abuser would come back to her.  (He always did, unfortunately.) She never wanted to get any help to change her situation – she was only concerned about preserving this sick dynamic at all costs.  No amount of tarot readings were going to break the cycle she had created for herself. This was too hard for me to deal with and beyond my ability to reach into her and crack open this vicious cycle she was actively pursuing.  This is a sign that someone needs professional  help.  I gave her the number of a good therapist and refused to see her again.  (All readers should not provide legal, medical or psychiatric services – have a list of appropriate resources handy for referrals if you encounter someone who needs to seek professional help.)

Ultimately, it all comes down to healthy boundaries and mutual respect.  While this is an intuitive and often times emotionally charged business, it IS still a business.  If you are working as a tarot reader, it is up to you to decide who you can serve and how best you can serve them with policies that create appropriate boundaries and a fair and clear presentation that allows clients to know what they can expect.

Blessings!
Theresa
www.thetarotlady.com

©The Tarot Lady | Theresa Reed

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